Diarrhea of the mouth

Sunday morning, 8:01 AM.

The God-fearing people in this area are putting on their fancy duds and heading out to church. Just last night, they were drunk and smoking wacky weed on my front porch. But, they were not afraid. They knew come Sunday morning they would head to church and the slate would be wiped clean.

I like being a Jew. No one expects ME to get up EVERY single Sunday morning and go redeem myself.

We Jews do it once a year. We fast for approximately 24 hours, do nothing but think about our sins and BAM! A clean slate. I can do 24 hours per calendar year; every Sunday just isn't gonna cut it.

So here on this beautiful Sunday morning as I get ready to head out for another day of fun, sun and sand with my family, I am going to go on a quick little rant.

I'll redeem myself for it on September 22nd.

Quick random thoughts of things that piss me off:

1. Spell check haters. What the HELL?? It's FREE. USE IT!
2. Grammar ignoring writers. I read about 50 blogs a day. If I see your, you're, their, there and they're used incorrectly one more time, I am going to flip like K-fed in divorce court.
3. Irregardless- It's not a word. Fucking A.
4. The overuse of quotes. "It" drives me crazy.
5. Spell check haters. Did I say that already?
6. Slow drivers. Get the hell out of my way.
7. The neighbor's husband, who has white spittle in the corners of his mouth.
8. The construction workers that are remodeling the house next door.
9. Opening the fridge to find Joey drank the last Diet Coke.
10. People that are too stupid to breathe in and out correctly, let alone get PAID to do a job that is obviously above THEIR heads. Some people were meant to be Doctors, some to work the fryer at Mickey D's. Before you accept a job, figure out which one you are. Chances are, you should be covered in fryer grease right now instead of collecting a paycheck from your current job.

WOW! I feel better. Thanks for letting me vent. I'm heading to the beach, hopefully to find I am the only one who found this new bathing suit on clearance.

Love,
Cici